Breaking the Cycle of Procrastination
Today I want to talk about PROCRASTINATION!
During the last 2 weeks procrastination has become even more visible in my life since I started my new part-time schedule. I now have 2 weeks of the month free from my corporate job! At the start of my first month I made a list of the things I wanted to do. Today, at the end of the month I can honestly say that I have not started or finished most of them 😔
Often in these situations we can default to putting the blame on time, your job, other people, and relationships. However, when I go to bed and when I stay alone with my consciousness, I recognize that I had the time and conditions but somehow I could not start, which is why this week’s topic is procrastination!
My most common excuses for procrastinating
I have come to realize that when I am scared of getting out of my comfort zone, or I am starting something new, I come up with two main excuses “I need to rest” or “I am too busy”. In order to prove that they're not excuses- they are real feelings, I manifest the physical need to rest or I really get super busy with unexpected things. Than I found myself in a mindset and energy that reflects back to me “Poor you, you are really tired, you need to rest, you can do it later “ or “ How can you do it all, you are soo busy, everything is on your shoulders.” (and bam real shoulder pain also starts). These 2 excuses can be real in some cases, sometimes all we need is rest, therefore it becomes harder for me to understand and differentiate if these are real needs or excuses. Sound familiar?
How I understand if my excuses are real or I am just procrastinating?
I have a simple answer for that: Feeling of Guilt. If I really need to rest, I don’t feel guilty and I do my task later after my rest with ease. If I am procrastinating, I start going into a cycle of making excuses and never feeling motivated to start.
How can we break the cycle of procrastination?
When you search for ways to overcome procrastination, there are so many articles, many of which tell you to just start now 😀 I wish it was that easy for me! Usually forcing myself to do it now is temporary and doesn’t lead to long sustainable results.
I prefer instead to try and understand the root causes of my procrastinating before adding in more practical steps. I believe one truth “Only when we realize, we can really release”. Therefore, it is important to me that I answer this question in order to see sustainable shifts: What is the root of my procrastination, what is really stopping me?
After doing some self-introspection, I can say FEAR is usually the biggest blocker here. I have seen various types of fears among my clients; fear of FAILURE, fear of SUCCESS, fear of BEING ALONE or fear of WHAT OTHERS SAY.
We are all different and we all have different issues in life, however these are often the most common fears that come up. For me, it is usually fear of FAILURE. As a kid, I believed the idea that to be successful and have a good life I had to have a good education; therefore, failure was my biggest fear. If you find yourself procrastinating when it comes to spending more time on your passion, hobbies, or maybe even procrastinating to start one, then I highly recommend looking deeper to find the fear that is holding you back.
5 Tips That Help Me to Overcome Procrastination
After realizing the fear that was holding me back, I used various methods I have learnt over the years to start to overcome my procrastination. I am currently using these to overcome my long-term procrastination of learning a new language.
As of last week, I have re-started learning Italian, something I have been putting off for over a year. I started taking some 1-1 classes in early 2019, here and there but never continued. I was always saying I am too busy for this. Finally, I decided to start it again. These steps help me to keep myself motivated 😀
1. Forgive yourself for procrastinating in the past
Guilt is like an inner poison, the more you let it stay there the more it makes you sick. Yes, you wasted time; yes, you could have done it earlier… your inner voice will never stop judging yourself unless you chose to forgive.
2. Find your reason for committing to the task
It is really challenging to initiate change or start something new, unless you know what your purpose/ reason is. When I say purpose I do not mean, holly “the meaning of life” purpose, I mean what desire would make you commit to it. I usually close my eyes and try to see myself after I have completed the task and envision how I would feel having accomplished it.
3. Commit to mini frequent steps (every little steps counts)
Being lazy is fun and easy 😀 Putting effort is not soo fun and can be overwhelming, so break the task down into mini steps that will make it easier to start! Every little step counts.
4. Find an accountability partner
I have always managed to create more shifts and changes in my life when I was being held accountable. It can be either someone professional or a friend who can help you track your progress and hold you accountable. This shift in mindset helped me tremendously in my healing journey. I would never be able to set up my business, if I hadn’t worked with someone professionally for the last 2 years. So I am using a similar approach for learning a new language, and have asked my teacher to hold me accountable 😀
5. Be patient with your progress, change may take time
Fear of failure hits even stronger when you start and fail. In this fast consumption era, we want results fast and when we don’t achieve them, we lack compassion for ourselves. When we fail, it is important to review first 4 steps and then get up and continue with small steps… As my Italian teacher says “Piano Piano”…
